When my oldest child was about eighteen months old, my husband still traveled. We had been painting our master bedroom before Sarge left, and while he was gone, I thought that I could be superwoman and finished painting our room while he was gone. My plan was to put it all back together and cleaned up before he came home. I thought it was a nice thing to do.
I was putting the finishing touches on the room - I opened the last gallon of paint to touch up those last few spots (har. har. for those who know how badly I paint - I could have painted for hours and still wouldn't have gotten all the spots I'd missed). I closed it up and went to get the last few things to hang on the wall.
I walked no further than 15 feet away into the kitchen to get something. I walked back and the scene I saw was one I couldn't believe.
There was my sweet eighteen month old child splashing in a gallon of paint that was pooling around him, all over the carpet at the foot of my bed. He was delighted with himself. So proud of what he'd discovered for himself.
I froze. Because, honestly, what do you do first?
I plucked my child from the puddle. I stripped him and washed him up as best I could and ran with him to my neighbor's house. "Please, would you watch him for just a minute? I have a GALLON OF PAINT IN MY CARPET."
I literally scooped half a gallon of paint back into the can. With my hands. I tried using my carpet cleaner. It was a joke - I could have done it for hours and it wouldn't have gotten all the paint up. I even called a carpet cleaning service - when the guy showed up he laughed. Literally. He wouldn't even touch it.
The next week, I took my sweet baby to have his portraits taken (He was my first. All his portraits were taken on the actual days. Not those blown-up snapshots taken a month after the fact. But whatever.) I dressed him in the shirt he had been wearing that day that had little splashes of paint around the bottom. So that we'd never forget.
And, this was totally supposed to be a post about the five gallon bucket of paint that sprung a leak at the bottom in my garage today while I was lifting it over my head, but I'll get to it.